Why do you cause yourself so much hurt?
Do you enjoy being sad and alone?
Can't you just open up and let your own sister help?
You cry,but when someone offers a hand,you completely ignore it?
What's the point of shedding those tears?
You beat yourself up over the mistakes that you've made,
You don't give your own self a chance.
If you can't love your own being,
How can you claim to love others?
Troubles that are so tiny,practically microscopic,
Are turned into problems as wide and unlimited as the sky.
How long more till you completely break yourself?
How long more till you actually accept the love around you?
Do you plan on building your life on hurt,revenge and sadness?
I don't know what else to do or say,
All I can do now is pray.
I love you so much!
Please know that,my sister.
Sunday, 27 May 2007
Frustration
Posted by EreinaJC at 11:27 pm 0 comments
Sanctuary
She screams,trying desperately to let all of her frustrations out.Over and over again it seems like she's making the same mistakes.Finally,she stops,panting.Her throat feels raw and painful.Tears stinging in her eyes as she tries her hardest not to let them fall.Thoughts racing in her head as she slowly slumps to the ground.The damp grass soaking the fabric of her jeans.She bows her head down,whether or not in defeat,she doesn't know herself.Everything around her is a blur,the same thing plays in her head like a CD put on repeat.The same words that shook her inside out,shocking her senses!She stares out at the world below her;the city stretched out far across from the spot she was sitting on on top of her hill.Yes,HER hill.No one was supposed to know this spot other than her.It was her sanctuary,the one place she felt secure and safe....
Posted by EreinaJC at 6:44 pm 1 comments
Wednesday, 23 May 2007
What?
So many thoughts running in my head,
Confusion and wonder ringing although there's no sound.
Words from my heart,now left unsaid,
Pain and tension forms knots and bounds.
I'm still trying to remember and recall,
All the things I said and did,
Before what you told me almost made me fall,
And now I'm trying desperately to hold on.
Posted by EreinaJC at 7:21 pm 0 comments
Saturday, 19 May 2007
Who You are to me
Lord,I need You...
With all my flaws and doubts,
You are the One that makes me whole.
No one can compare when it comes to Your love for me.
In my brokenness,I call out Your magnificent name,
My Father,my Creator,my Friend,I'm calling for Thee.
All I want is to see You face to face,
How it will be,I imagine everyday.
Without fail,You pick me up,
You unlock my broken heart.
Without You,I would never have been free,
Without You,I wouldn't be me.
All my hopes,and all my dreams,
You hold in your hands,my tender pleas.
Posted by EreinaJC at 8:04 pm 0 comments
Wednesday, 16 May 2007
I pray
Lord,I feel so broken up inside.I feel so helpless,Lord.I don't have the strength to hold onto everything in my life on my own,Lord!!I need You,Jesus!I can't stand straight and hold my head high without Your.I can't keep my home without You.Everything seems so 'done',so unchangeable!!!Lord,I know You can and will change it for me according to Your plans!Whatever Your plans are for my family and I,I welcome it with open arms,longing arms.I'm so small without You,Lord.Holy Spirit continue to stir my spirit,to urge me to the right path,right decisions.Continue to minister to my heart,my problems.I love my home,Lord.I love my family,and I know they're hurting inside as well.Jesus,they need YOU!!!No one else can take Your place!!Help them see that,Lord!!!I need them to know You,Your love for them,Your promises for them.I pray Lord,that you give me peace.Help me face this problem bravely and filled with hope and faith in YOU!!There is none like You,GOD!No one...I pray all this is Jesus' precious name,Amen...
Posted by EreinaJC at 7:43 pm 0 comments
See me,please?
Do you see me in the crowd?
As I'm desperate to catch your eye;
Seeing you laugh and smile without me by your side,
Kills me deep inside.
Happy as I am for you,
I cannot help but hope;
For a future that includes me and you,
Inside your golden globe world.
Any second I could fall,
If not for your tiny gestures of care.
As tiny as they may be,
I want them all to be for me.
How can one so great be there a while,
And yet disappear in a magician's cloud?
Dragged away willingly by your wiles,
The you that was never meant for me.
Posted by EreinaJC at 4:17 pm 0 comments
I thought...
I thought you were my friend,
I thought you'd hold onto my hand.
Now a year has passed,
And on your face,there's a mask
True or false,I don't know which,
All I know is it makes you tick.
Whether or not I say it all,
All you do is watch me fall.
You think I'm fake,
Well,no I'm not!
You watch me shake,
Waiting for me to rot.
Gruesome as things are now,
I cling onto my ball of hope.
All I need is for you to know,
I'm sorry,I'm still trying to cope.
Posted by EreinaJC at 4:11 pm 0 comments
Why Dad?
You tell me I'm wasting time,
You tell me to just stay inside.
The world's a horrible place,
You won't be able to show your face.
Everything you do is useless,
Everything you make is worthless.
Why bother?Why care?
It's not like anyone knows you're there.
You're delusional,wake up!
Open your eyes to the death in life.
You'll never be able to get that cleaned up,
Just stay at home,away from knives.
But,I do see it!
Everything around,its harmony calls to me.
Why must there be limits?
Do you really love me?
You tell me you'll always be there by my side,
Nothing in the world would make you run and hide.
Yet,now in truth I see the light,
It's not on you,its on your fright.
You pretend to be strong.
You think you're always right,
But do you know what's in my head?
Do you know what I think at night?
You know nothing about me,
You understand nothing at all;
Yet you act all courageous and brave,
Attempt to catch me when I fall.
As usual,at the last minute you bail,
Staying by my side,that's what you've failed.
You walk away,turning back,
That's what you did,Dad!
Posted by EreinaJC at 3:52 pm 0 comments
Monday, 14 May 2007
All I do
Every step that I take,
I want to life up Your name;
To see a nation that claims,
That You are Father.
Rejoice in Your embrace,
Call out Your wondrous name.
In awe of Your majesty,
You are my Creator.
And I sing,to give You glory,
And I dance,to bring You praise,
I jump,to reach out to You,my King.
Climb up,to every mountain,
Dive in,to every sea,
Run to,my salvation;
Yes,You are alive in me.
Posted by EreinaJC at 5:55 pm 0 comments
Desperation
Everything I do,I do it for You.
Everything I say,I say it for You.
When I make mistakes,You don't turn away,
You call me closer to You.
Nothing can ever compare to You;
You alone are all that's mighty.
You are the wind that's calling my name;
You are my everything.
Show them Your mighty power,
Teach them to sing from within.
Open their eyes for they are blinded,
Cleanse us from our sins.
Reach down and tell the mountains,
Every ocean obeys Your command.
I want to serve You as I stand on this land
Lord,let my life begin.
Posted by EreinaJC at 5:33 pm 0 comments
You Give Me
I was wandering,so lost and confused,
Looking out for,someone to cling onto.
All around me,everyone seemed so lost,
Yet You found me,and reside in my heart.
Leaning onto,all that You are,
Crying out when,I feel You're so far.
You held onto me,kept me safe,
We will never be apart.
You give me hope,You give my strength,
You give me love,You held onto my hand;
So I give You my all.
You give me courage,You give me peace,
You give me blessings,and cleanse my sins;
That is why,oh Lord,I will give You my heart.
I cling onto You,as close as I can;
Hold onto Your hand and walk Your path.
You know I'm weak,You make me strong,
You help me to right all my wrongs.
Posted by EreinaJC at 5:23 pm 0 comments
Friday, 11 May 2007
I need...
Thinking about what's been going on,
Sulking about all that I've done wrong.
How is it possible for anyone to be strong?
Discouragement ringing in my head,
Telling me who I should be instead.
I need to be free,
I need to embrace what's left of my sanity!
I want to get out of all my failures,
I want to be hold on,be able to stand strong.
I want to prove that I can be all that I want to be.
Walking and talking and dreaming of what could be!
Shoving aside all those demands that are clinging on me.
I've done my best,done what I can do,
Gave it my all,hoped I wouldn't fall,
Just to be me...
Posted by EreinaJC at 6:45 pm 0 comments
Him..
Fear pounds inside me unwanted,
It soaks right intomy skin uninvited.
The need to get rid of this emotion.
Then need to be set free.
I think of this one person,
That can help me flap my wings.
He takes me to this familliar place,
One that I know happiness it will bring.
A love so strong it devours all pain.
The fear inside me just goes away.
This love,so strong and mighty,
It keeps me safe from my old mistakes.
Posted by EreinaJC at 6:02 pm 0 comments
Take a Stand
Standing and listening to the complaints of the world,
Everyone's got something they don't like about the way things are done.
Words from our mouths poison the world,
Yet no one takes a stand.
To open the eyes of those who are blind,
Blind to the beauty that surrounds us.
And yet they take everything to be trash;
They themselves started it all,
Still no one bothers to make it end.
Posted by EreinaJC at 5:51 pm 0 comments
Taken for Granted
The unknown love of another,held in your hands.
Eyes pleadingly asking to be more than 'just friends'.
How can we be so clueless at some times?
Whilst others are staring helplessly,asking for second tries.
Colder than ice your eyes pierce through mine.
Leaving me blind to the true needs I long in life.
Just to see a glimpse of your smile,
I do the unexpected that's not even worthwhile.
Why are my actions taken for granted?
Despite all I've been through,
I get no more than a lousy fried nugget.
Posted by EreinaJC at 5:31 pm 0 comments